C Sections

As for the size thing – are c-sections common in France? ❋ Unknown (2009)

What started to happen, however, was that c-sections were getting scheduled earlier and earlier in the pregnancy, and given uncertainty in the actual due-date for some pregnancies, the occasional scheduled c-section was being done before 37 weeks of gestation, producing a preterm newborn. ❋ M.D. Adam Wolfberg (2011)

Using plain old canine sperm and vaginas, we've made dogs that have so many health problems that they can only exist because they have us to perform c-sections and wipe their bums. ❋ Anna Jane Grossman (2011)

Now many times I have thought I saw some odd look in the eye of a homebirther about my having had three c-sections but no one has ever actually said anything critical of me to my face. ❋ Unknown (2009)

The number of c-sections performed between 3pm-6pm and 9pm-11pm is significantly larger than during any other time of day. ❋ Unknown (2009)

Except, that is, in the rather more than the 50% of the cases – according to NHS figures –where nature make a bit of a bish and science intervenes with forceps, scissors, anaesthetic, emergency c-sections. ❋ Unknown (2011)

I had a 14 hr labor with 3 hours of pushing with my first son, a 16 hr labor with my 2nd and both resulted in c-sections! ❋ Unknown (2009)

I did go years feeling that I had to give every gruesome detail of how the c-sections happened in order to justify how I got there – a desperate “see, I really really tried!” ❋ Unknown (2009)

No scientific evidence exists which supports a DNA change or nature of being change via birth (evident especially since everybody knows that everybody knows about premies and about c-sections and similar). ❋ Unknown (2010)

Set to their own timelines dictated by unique internal landscapes, they were unexpectedly born by their own automatic c-sections, tearing open their silken resurrection machines with teeth of steel, motivated by the solely by the need to be heard: shrill, or muted, or bleached, or candied — but always louder than a nuclear blast. ❋ Brianne (2011)

Now that the World Health Organisation, like Nice, can find no empirical grounds to ration c-sections, expense is the most coherent objection. ❋ Unknown (2011)

she: I [got] [twins]. He:[Oh], so you'll get c-section. ❋ Tom.za (2011)

See that [loser kid] [riding the short bus]? He is [such a] c section. ❋ Kidstoday (2010)

Yes [Andi], a c-section or [caesarean section] is a medical [procedure]. But I guess since medicaldictionary.com doesn't let people post their own definitions you had to come do it here instead. Can someone say, DESPERATELY LONELY AND CRYING OUT FOR ATTENTION? ❋ ElBorracho (2005)

Tom and [Brad] got in a fight at the bar last night and [brad] gave tom a hillbilly c section with a nigga knife after [smashing] his beer bottle against the bar [counter] Watch out or else ill give you a hillbilly c section with this bottle nigga ❋ Shlubster (2014)

[Bubba's] gunna give you a [jailhouse c-section]. When playing [Starcraft], Novawar usually gets a jailhouse c-section. ❋ Mysticbucket (2012)

1. "Hey, did you check today's [c-section comics]?" "Sure, it's my fourth favorite comic right after cyanide and happiness, the oatmeal, and [ctrl-alt-del] "Fuck you" 2. "I wanted to decorate my clinic, so I printed some c-section comics and hung them up on the wall" "You're the craziest [OB-GYN] I ever met" ❋ Maili (2013)

[Bubba] just gave Jeff a [jailhouse c-section] and now he's [bleeding out] his ass! ❋ Skeletorfarnsworth (2012)

Thanks to [Big Bubba] giving me the [raping] of my life, I must now go to the [infirmary] to receive my Jailhouse C-Section. ❋ Casnasty (2012)

Jeff: How was your 5-year sentence? [Adam]: Terrible. [Bubba] gave me a [jailhouse C-section] everyday. ❋ TheIronGiant (2012)

Person 1: [Hey you] heard about the new kid? Person 2: Yeah I wouldn't [mess with] him, heard he was a [reverse C-section]. ❋ Goofygoober1738 (2020)