Child Support

FREE LEGAL CLINICS, for low-income residents, consultations on custody and child-support issues, debt management, immigration and more. 8: 30 a. m.-5 p.m. (first and third Thursdays). ❋ Post (2010)

The U.S. Border Patrol canceled the recruitment and hiring of 400 new agents and various delinquent child-support cases were delayed. ❋ Unknown (2011)

Since 2007, Oregon's deal with U.S. Bancorp for unemployment and child-support benefits has resulted in $11.5 million in cost savings, the agency says. ❋ Jessica Silver-Greenberg (2011)

We cannot tolerate this any longer, and as I have mentioned before, his personal and egregious child-support scandals coupled with his official performance merit resignation now. ❋ Raja Krishnamoorthi (2011)

Legal disputes, child-support payments, speeding tickets, car insurance—everything can be taken care of in-house. ❋ Nate Jackson (2011)

Shit, all women get in free with they Family First card or a child-support printout. ❋ Meesha Mink (2011)

Merkich asked for joint legal and physical custody of Presley, asked that her surname be changed to Merkich, and stated that he was willing to pay his statutorily-required child-support obligation .... ❋ Unknown (2010)

Getting rid of paper checks and postage is hard to resist for cash-strapped governments, which last year steered $53.2 billion in unemployment benefits and child-support payments to prepaid debit cards, up 33% from 2009, according to Mercator Advisory Group Inc., a research firm in Maynard, Mass. ❋ Jessica Silver-Greenberg (2011)

Former NBA forward Shawn Kemp (who has at least seven children by six women) and, more recently, Travis Henry (nine by nine) have seen their fortunes sapped by monthly child-support payments in the tens of thousands of dollars. ❋ Unknown (2009)

Seven of the 10 refused to continue working for the business for various reasons, including some who didn't want to complete a W-2 form because of outstanding child-support payments, he says. ❋ Sarah E. Needleman (2011)

Pasqualino Cornelio will also not recoup any of the child-support money he paid out since the couple separated a decade ago, Justice Katherine van Rensburg wrote in her decision. ❋ Not A Sheep (2009)

More than 40 U.S. states use prepaid debit cards to funnel unemployment benefits, child-support payments and other funds to recipients. ❋ Jessica Silver-Greenberg (2011)

But in recent years, the trend has moved toward shared custody and child-support arrangements that often factor in the relative strengths and weaknesses of each parent. ❋ Ashby Jones (2011)

It may not be a crime to be poor, but it can land you behind bars if you also are behind on your child-support payments. ❋ The Huffington Post News Editors (2011)

Divorced with three kids, his youngest just days from legal maturity, I knew Robert soon would be child-support free. ❋ Cherise Wolas (2010)

According to court documents, Mr. Pimentel owes $9,100 in child-support payments. ❋ Sean Gardiner (2011)

Last month Henry, who reportedly earned almost $11 million over seven years in the NFL, tried and failed to temporarily reduce one of his nine child-support payments by arguing that he could no longer afford the $3,000 every month. ❋ Unknown (2009)

Mark : Oh Kiersten your pussy is so soft im gonna cum! Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh! [Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh]! Kiersten : Oh Mark! Oh Mark! your going to make such a great dad! Mark : WHAT! Don't you use birth control? Kiersten : No you silly boo I want to have your baby! DUH! Mark : Oh no there will be no baby [I have a wife] and kids! Kiersten : Well Jake say's he can't afford three so your Child Support will certainly help! Mark : There will be no Child Support from me get out of my gym NOW! Kiersten : Well I guess we will see what the judge say's about that cause your cum is inside me now and they may be enough for twins! Mark : GOD DAMNT THE HELL! Steve : Hey Mark you can [fill me up] with your cum and don't worry I won't be needing any Child Support! (wink) Mark : QUIT RUBBING MY DICK YOU FUCKIN FAG! Steve : Whatever you deadbeat dad! (slap) Mark : FUCK! FUCK! FUCK! Steve : Yeah that's what got you in trouble in the first place! Mark : GET THE FUCK OUT OF MT GYM YOU FAGGOT! ❋ SlopNChop (2018)

[Ex Wife]: I need some extra money for the kids Dr. Appointment this week. [Ex Husband]: I dont understand. I have the exact same expenses you do, we share the kids 50 - 50, and I pay you child support and [alimony] on top of that. Then I have to split all medical bills too. Ex Wife: You are such a piece of shit! Your a loser! Ex Husband: You are getting all the money from me that you are going to get!!!! Ex Wife: Why wont you work with me on this? Im trying to communicate with you? Ex Husband: Sounds like you need to get married and divorced again so you can get even more of a free ride! You have 5 kids, 2 ex husbands and an ex boyfriend, dont have a job, and are a waste of carbon!!! Ex Wife: Sob, sob, sob. [Blah, blah, blah]. Ex Husband: Gotta go get ready and pack for my vacation with my kids and my new hootche mama. Do you wanna talk to the kids? ❋ Mr. Response (2006)

[Child support] needs to be [abolished]. It's [abused] more than it's properly used. ❋ Xxxxxxxxfanboyxxxxxxxxxx (2020)

Friend 1: "man, my [ex-wife] just [hit me] with that damn child support!" Friend 2: "well...there are always [hitmen] for hire..." ❋ Intellectual Black Man (2008)

1) I'm glad Tyrone pays child support. He dated [Gladys], pumped & dumped her, and has never bothered to see Tyrone Jr. 2) Bethany has the kids, but, no job. Eric hardly ever gets to see his kids. He is forced to pay lots of child support money, but he doesn't get to enjoy his children. I think equally shared physical [custody] & no child support should always be encouraged by the [courts], and only parents who DON'T want to take their children should have to pay child support. ❋ $ugar Daddy (2009)

Hey, [yknow] my pregnant girlfriend [mick]? [Yeah what] about her? I gave her a child support ❋ Djfhahdbgn (2022)

Larry played professional basketball. His financial success gave him the instant [Shaq Appeal]. In [a span of] 12 months, he fathered 7 children by seven different women and had to pay $15,000 per month per child due to a [judge's] rulling. Larry tore up his knee and lost his basketball career and endorsements. He now works at a car wash and takes home $87 dollars a week after taxes and child support payments. ❋ Mr. Dwayne (2004)

[My mom] couldn't [remember] how to open her [email] so she called me for child support. ❋ Lurchman (2011)

[Kiersten] was so excited to see Tyrone with a child support check (the first in six months), she decided do him a favor and go [to bed] with him, only to find out later he had [impregnated] her again. ❋ Richard Black (2005)

"I came early in my girlfriend today. [Creampie]!" -Rick "Ask me how it feels in [nine] months when she's paying child support." -Wilson "Nah, she's getting [an abortion]." -Rick ❋ Albert Freidstein IV (2015)