Tabloidese

Yet what gets lost in the translation of Kerry Katona's life into tabloidese – the photos of her shaping up one moment, and falling to pieces the next – is the fact that this isn't simply a reality TV star making bad life choices for us to ridicule and deride – it's what mental illness looks like. ❋ Unknown (2011)

Absorb enough tabloidese and eventually it owns your neurons. ❋ Unknown (2010)

Monmouth Conservative Assembly Member, David Davies, is at it again, using effective tabloidese to make a telling political point. ❋ Unknown (2004)

Rita, who first appeared in 2000's Harry Potter And The Goblet of Fire and was played by Miranda Richardson in the films of the books, was famous for her Quick-Quotes Quill, a magical pen that automatically translates an interview into tabloidese. ❋ WalesOnline (2011)

It has always surprised me that readers appear to accept tabloidese as a written, rather than a spoken, language. ❋ Unknown (2010)

Daily Mirror journalists away from the sin of writing tabloidese. ❋ Unknown (2010)

Announcing that his out-of-form striker's Mr 15% had told Man Utd chief exec David Gill that Wayne was not interested in signing another contract with United, Wounded Ferg looked genuinely hurt as he revealed the "terribly disappointing news" that the tabloidese prefix ❋ Barry Glendenning (2010)

It is the art of tabloidese - those words and phrases that red-top newspapers use because they are "popular" yet have never been uttered in real life by a single person, not once, not ever. ❋ Unknown (2010)