Tallywhacker

Spray-painting "tallywhacker" on my headstone seems excessive though. ❋ Patrick Sauer (2010)

I haven't seen his "tallywhacker" in a few years, but the last time I saw it, I was envious. ❋ Unclebob (2001)

A tallywhacker, by the way, is that cloth flap on the back of a sailor's shirt ... just in case you didn't know! ❋ Unknown (2009)

After hemming and hawing uncharacteristically for a few minutes, he summed up his “birds and bees” talk by advising John: “Son, for now, you just use that little tallywhacker there for peeing through.” ❋ Amy Yasbeck (2010)

I had to submit to an initiation where they were gonna nail my tallywhacker to a log that was already burning at one end and then see if I had enough scoutskilz to disattach myself--before I became a "hot dot"--without ripping off my nascent manhoodliness. ❋ Unknown (2009)

I'm going to have to cut off my tallywhacker to destroy the evidence. ❋ Unknown (2009)

Finally I couldn't hold it any longer, so I lifted the radio to the side of me and pulled out my tallywhacker and let go, lying on my side. ❋ Maggie Jochild (2007)

He had said to watch especially for black widows and, with an exaggerated laugh, added that he knew a man once who got bit on the end of his tallywhacker and it swoll up almost three times normal size. ❋ Carl Wooton (2009)

  He had said to watch especially for black widows and, with an exaggerated laugh, added that he knew a man once who got bit on the end of his tallywhacker and it swoll up almost three times normal size. ❋ Unknown (2009)

Too busy swinging the ole tallywhacker down at Zipolite to spend time making fun of ancient goobers? ❋ Unknown (2006)

The story goes that when Rasputin was murdered in 1916, a chambermaid appropriated his tallywhacker after the autopsy. ❋ Unknown (2007)

The story that best demonstrates my second hand knowledge of tallywhacker misrepresentation will not contain any real names. ❋ Wilberteets (2005)

Not because we hope to get another glimpse of Beecher's tallywhacker this week. ❋ Unclebob (2002)

So Dad announces to the room full of doctors and nurses "If there's anyone here who hasn't seen my tallywhacker yet, please come check it out now." ❋ Unclebob (2001)

He then went on a long story about how everyone in the hospital was checking out his tallywhacker (penis). ❋ Unclebob (2001)

I told you guys about how my 13 month-old son Andrew has discovered his tallywhacker ... right? ❋ Unclebob (2001)

They all work together for the most part, with the exception of Paul who sits at home and takes pictures of his mangled tallywhacker and admires the colors. ❋ Unclebob (2000)

I have a friend, who shall remain nameless, who told me she liked to stick the tip of her tongue INSIDE the guy's tallywhacker while she's blowing him. ❋ Unclebob (2000)

Hey man, don't [forget] to [bring] [protection] for your tallywhacker when you go to a party. ❋ Ron (2004)

yo [bruv] have you seen the [b52] [stealth bomber] i made with my tallywhacker. yeah it stinks o cheese ❋ Kevvy (2004)

After hearing the [moans] of pleasure delivered by his tallywhacker, [the john] demanded and received a [discount]. ❋ Bigbootyluvva (2009)

"[Tuck in] your tallywhacker" ❋ Farmerjk (2019)

"hey [sweety], you wanna see my [tallywhacker]?" "princess, how good would a [mouthful] of tallywhacker be?" "bend over! here comes the tallywhacker" ❋ Tania (2004)

❋ Cyphercube (2003)

I'm just off to the [little boys room] to show my [tallywhacker] [the toilet]. ❋ Robbo (2003)

Come Mr. [Talley] Man and [Tally] Me [Banana]. ❋ Charles (2005)

❋ Hugo T. Hackenbush (2003)

Yo, [James]! Going inside the [stall] 'cuz your [tallywhacker's] too small? ❋ Mikgriffen (2021)