Titmouse

If I count that as a vote against titmouse, which is what my gut instructs me to do, then we have a final tally in order of funniness of: ❋ Unknown (2008)

The titmouse is a fun little visitor to my yard as well. ❋ Unknown (2008)

Whatever would they do with the word about a bird called a titmouse? ❋ Michael Allen (2005)

About two dozen or more of a little bird called the titmouse had all perched on one tree, where they were pecking, and fighting, and love-making, and noise-making, all at the same time. ❋ Anonymous (N/A)

One species alone spends its whole time in the woods and fields, never retreating for succour in the severest seasons to houses and neighbourhoods; and that is the delicate long-tailed titmouse, which is almost as minute as the golden-crowned wren; but the blue titmouse or nun (_Parus caeruleus_), the cole-mouse ❋ Gilbert White (1756)

-- as quick as a wink he was changed into a titmouse, which is the least of all the birds in that land. ❋ Unknown (1887)

Some of her colleagues in the House have not been too polite-she has been called a "titmouse" and told "Just quiet down, baby." ❋ Unknown (1988)

The "titmouse" walnut produces very delicate fruit, rich in oil, and with thin shells, so that the little creatures can pierce the husks and shells while the fruit is still on the bough. ❋ William Thomas Fernie (N/A)

As one does not speak of the "egg-box" of the titmouse, meaning "the nest of the titmouse," why should I invoke the box in speaking of the Mantis? ❋ Jean-Henri Fabre (1869)

"There is no more faithful mother in the forest than the blue titmouse, which is a cousin to the chickadee," continued the policeman, "and this spring Tom Titmouse and his wife Nancy set up housekeeping in a little hollow in an elm-tree about half a mile north of this spot. ❋ Unknown (1887)

If I have any criticism, it's only that they're usually the same handful of species — chickadees, titmouse, blue jays, juncos, goldfinch, nuthatches, mourning doves, cardinals, purple finch. ❋ Ralph Gardner Jr. (2011)

But they were well-mannered, loitering beneath the feeders, waiting for whatever sunflower seeds the finicky nuthatches and—does anyone happen to know whether titmice is the plural of titmouse—happened to toss aside in their search for the perfect seed. ❋ Ralph Gardner Jr. (2012)

Butler makes Stallone look like a titmouse -- but then again, I have a very staunch idea of what make a film star. ❋ Patricia Rust (2011)

Fred had middled it straight through college her only life until then and had come out believing that even if she would never seem strong, swarthy, butch, or scary, at least she could try not to seem like a titmouse. ❋ Ann Bogle (2011)

The timid titmouse and fluffy chickadee, it turns out, are close relatives of the largest, most powerful carnivores that ever lived. ❋ Sy Montgomery (2010)

Of the 20-odd bird species present in mature forest, the most common are the pine warbler, cardinal, summer tanager, Carolina wren, ruby-throated hummingbird, blue jay, hooded warbler, eastern towhee, and tufted titmouse. ❋ Unknown (2009)

The most abundant resident birds are the bushtit, pinyon jay, plain titmouse, black-chinned hummingbird, Woodhouse's jay, red-tailed hawk, golden eagle, red-shafted flicker, and rock wren. ❋ Unknown (2009)

The most abundant breeding birds include the cardinal, tufted titmouse, wood thrush, summer tanager, red-eyed vireo, blue-gray gnatcatcher, and Carolina wren. ❋ Unknown (2009)

The pinyon jay is typical of the pinyon-juniper forest, which also supports the plain titmouse and black-throated gray warbler, along with flocks of bushtits. ❋ Unknown (2009)

There was a tufted titmouse perched in the Russian Parking Space Blockers' tree as opposed to my own illegal tree in the morning. ❋ Unknown (2009)

"[What the hell] is that on my [window ledge]?" "Don't worry dude, [chill], its just a titmouse." ❋ Matt[O] (2005)

[Dolly Parton] is [the queen] titmouse. ❋ Schlomo McSweenie (2006)

The other day I was hunting in my [backyard] and shot a titmouse [right out] of [the tree]! ❋ Farcus Prime (2005)

"[Joe] would [live in] her [cleavage] if he could. He is a total titmouse." ❋ NihilistDom (2009)

"[Bek], button a button. You have a titmouse at ten o'clock," Cherry said, [tucking] a scarf into the front of her dress to [discourage] the creepy little man. ❋ BIrqul (2012)

❋ Moley (2003)

[steve] [you are] totaly a [giant] titmouse ❋ Lukeboi (2006)

"She has the [memory] of a titmouse." "[Sorry], I totally [blanked]; I have the memory of a titmouse today." ❋ M.L. Faire (2015)

Is that a [titmouse]? ❋ Hastagyolol'egg (2017)

[Gordon]: I'd love to be [Nigella Lawson's] [titmouse]. ❋ Citizen Sade (2008)